Managing Change…

It is quiet, impressionless, full of light but leading nowhere, all senses seem to stop working and right now the only thing I can feel is my running nose, and only thought I am able to think is, what is it?? My mind is very lazily, so very slowly trying to make sense out of my surroundings, my senses, my numb senses are trying to feel and I am trying to bring some life to my day…

Is that how ‘change’ feels like in the beginning, I wonder…

I think in order to understand change, it is very very important to understand one’s ownself and before that, it is very important to accept, or atleast acknowledge the change. Only then the transition would be possible, only then we would let ourselves move from ‘past’ to ‘present’..

It is known vs. unknown

It is predictability vs. unpredictability

Change raises questions like:

What am I doing vs. what I was doing?

Why am I doing this vs. why was I doing that?

Where would it lead me? Vs. where would have I been if I hadn’t opted for change?

It makes us count for losses and gains

But then we can never really count for the losses and gains until we have seen it all… and also, how can we measure the losses and gains if we haven’t gotten into the change cycle with whole of ourselves…

So for now it is like I am hanging somewhere between letting go of what it was and embracing, what it is…I am not sure how long it is going to take… I think all I should be doing at the moment is to go with the tide and try hard to understand as to what it is I am really doing… beyond that, I don’t know anymore…

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